Those Pesky ResolutionsPosted: December 31, 2012
“My biggest goal for this year is to celebrate my eightieth birthday,” I said. Then I laughed and added, “ I’m not sure what I’ll do after that because I can’t imagine being old.”
One of the best things about getting to the wisdom age is that you know that life is what it is. That means it never jogs backward but always trots forward.
This year, I’m not making resolutions or setting goals. I’ve decided to enjoy life. I live in Sunny San Diego and I’m going to stretch my arms upward and smile back at the sun the next time it shines on me.
That’s not a resolution. I love the sun and I claim my right to enjoy every moment. I am not going to work at being anything. I spent the majority of my life trying very hard to improve and then discovered I was already perfect, whole and complete from the get-go. From now on – I’m on vacation.
I’ve decided to follow the advice I received about 39 years ago. I am going to live one day at a time. That means, I am going to do more or less what I want. If I want to watch old movies all day, I will. If I want to go to the gym, I will.
I know the key to delightful aging is supposed to be learning new things. In previous years, I would have made a goal list and written, “Learn better Spanish”, or “Study social media”, but not this year. This is the year I declare that I love myself the way I am.
It’s true that I benefited from hard work in the past and I don’t really begrudge it, but I choose to move into true acceptance in 2013. I am going to take a leaf from my friend Dr. David Walker’s book, and say, “I Am Enough”.
Truth is, I already know an awful lot of stuff no one else knows. When I leave the planet, I’m convinced there will be no one left who knows the difference between lie and lay or affect and effect. Everyone will say, “He invited John and I to the party” and no one will cringe.
In my lifetime, I’ve learned a great deal about a great many things. For example, I learned how to put on makeup, brush my hair until it shone, dress to look slimmer, and use good table manners. It got me what I wanted at that time and it was fun while it lasted but that was then and this is now. I’ve dropped romance and now prefer sunshine keep my bones warm.
At one time or another, I used to know how to sew, cook, garden, and knit. I could make pottery, draw, paint, dance, write long sentences, and teach school. I learned about New Thought history, English literature, and the history of the opera, art, and film. It was all very interesting at the time.
Once, I knew a whole lot of poetry and literature by heart. I knew Emerson’s essays, Freud’s theories and the Zen stories. I knew the tales of the Bal Shem Tov and the Brothers Grimm. I could read Tarot cards, practice yoga, swim, play poker, play canasta, sell real estate, and dress for success. I even once knew the difference between shall and will.
I am – in short – an accomplished woman. So I won’t be writing any new resolutions this year. I like my life pretty much the way it is. After all, it took me a long time to settle into my particular rut.
So what if I prefer my old movies to the new ones? I am perfectly happy looking at Myrna Loy and William Powell drink their way thorough the Thin Man series. So what if I think Otis Redding is a better singer than those new guys whose names sound so peculiar. I understand the lyrics when Otis sings.
It’s true there are many, many things I never learned. I can’t sing. I never could touch my toes. For that matter, I never really learned to keep house. But I tried for as long as I cared to struggle. From now on, I’m going with the flow.
It is also true there are some things I might be able to learn if I set my head to it. I probably should have learned some of them a long time ago but I don’t intend to start now. I’ve travelled this far without multiplication tables, so I figure I can coast the rest of the way. BofA computers keep my bank balance now and I’ve had an account with Bank of America since I was fourteen. Why switch horses?
As for technology. I’ve already learned more than I wanted although I admit that my technological relationships are somewhat disfunctional. I had a fax machine and it went out of style. My scanner is too dim and my copier is crooked. I have a cell phone but it doesn’t work at my valley home. I have two Apple computers and only one of them gets the internet. I can’t download Netflix and the complaints go on…and on.
I was a liberal arts major. What can you expect of someone who didn’t even see a TV until she was 14 and didn’t turn on another one until she was 35?
Like Blanche DuBois in Streetcar Named Desire, I depend on the kindness of strangers (actually, mostly my relatives) when it comes to modern devices. I was in the hospital for two days last year and they let me go home early, probably because every time young Dr. Kildare came in, I asked him to help me with my cell phone.
I did not get a Kindle for Christmas because I did not want one. I love my books even if some are dusty. I don’t like machines and I do love books so why would I mix pleasure with pain? . You can’t underline the good books on a Kindle. You can’t trade the trashy ones in for more trashy ones.
Now that I’ve declared my independence. I give myself permission to change my mind. I will make some resolutions – at least for this day.
I Say No-No
I am not going to try to keep up.
I am not going to do things because they are good for me.
I am not going to criticize myself or others.
I Say Yes-Yes
I am going to march to my own drummer.
I am going to enjoy every moment I can.
I am going to see God in everyone.
I am going to have a Happy New Year.
May 2013 be filled with Love, Light, Joy, Wisdom, Health, Wealth and Lot’s Of Fun. You deserve the best!